Life in Atlanta and the U.S.A.

Communication

In the United States, people are very direct in conversation. It is not impolite to say no. If someone asks or offers you something, you can say “No, thank you.”

Here are some examples of where it is appropriate to say no:

• You may receive phone calls from people trying to sell you something, these are called telemarketers. It is ok to tell them no, and to even hang up if they keep talking to you.
• You may also have people invite you to their church or religious service. If you do not want to attend, you can simply say, “No, thank you. I would not like to go.”
• In the downtown area, it is common for panhandlers to ask you for money. If they approach you, do not give them money. Panhandling is illegal and there are food banks and charities that will offer services to people who need it.
• If someone offers you drugs. Drugs are illegal in the United States. Always say no.
• Similarly, if you are under the age of 21, drinking alcohol is illegal—and you should say no if offered alcohol. **The drinking age in the United States is 21, drinking under age or providing alcohol to a minor is illegal!**
• If you do not want food or drink that someone offers you, you can say no.

Friends

In the United States, particularly in the south, it is very common for people to be friendly.

Someone may be friendly to you but not wish to build a friendship, this is common.

You may also have people you do not know smile or wave at you—it is customary to say “hello” or smile and wave back.

Similarly, it is appropriate to approach another student and introduce yourself.

“Hi, how are you?” is a common greeting in the United States, so much so people sometimes say it without waiting for a reply. If they do wait for a reply, it is customary to reply, “well” or “okay.”

Sometimes, people in the Unites States only hang out with their group of friends. This group is often called a “Clique.” Sometimes when someone is with their clique they may not be friendly. This does not mean the person does not like you, they may just be preoccupied with their group of friends.

If you are romantically interested in someone, it is appropriate to tell the person that you are interested and ask if they would like to have coffee or dinner sometime. If this person is not interested they will likely tell you, “No, thank you.” If they say this, do not ask again, being persistent is seen as rude and sometimes aggressive.

Likewise, if someone asks you out on a date and you are not interested, it is polite and appropriate to say, “I am not interested, but thank you.”

Diversity

Many people in the United States like to think that all people are equal—race, color, religion, ethnicity, class, gender, and sexual orientation are unimportant to our value as human beings. For this reason, racist and sexist jokes and comments are not tolerated in many social and business settings.

However, despite these principles, many inequalities still exist in the United States. You may hear people make negative comments about other groups. You may even experience discrimination because you are an international student. If this happens to you and you wish to talk about it, talk to a counselor from the Counseling Center or someone from the International Student Services Office.

Some international students are surprised to hear men and women say they are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender. There is a growing community of Americans who identify themselves as gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender and do not believe that it is necessary to keep this a secret. This community has become more visible and accepted, and people who are part of this population form a respected part of U.S. society. You will most likely have a professor, classmate, roommate, or friend who is gay. Remember to treat the people you meet with the same respect and openness that you would want to be treated with.